At first I was afraid, I was petrified . . .
When you said you had 10 inches
Lord, I almost died
But I'd spent oh so many years just waiting for a man that long
That I grew strong
And I knew that I could take you on . . .
But there you are
Another lie
I was ready for a big mac
And you've brought me a french fry
I should have known that it was bullshit
Just a sad pathetic dream
Should have known there was no anaconda
Lurking in those jeans
Go on now go
Walk out the door
Don't you promise me 10 inches then turn up with only 4
Weren't you a prat to think I wouldn't catch you out
Don't you know we're only joking when we say size doesn't count
I will survive, I will survive
Coz as long as I have batteries
My sex life's gonna thrive
I will always have good sex with a handful of latex
I will survive, I will survive . . . hey hey
It took all my self control not to laugh out loud
When I saw your little weiner standing tall and proud
But to hell with all your egos and to hell with all your needs
Now I'm saving all my lovin for a cordless multispeed
Go on now go
Just make a dash
Last time I saw a prick that small was watching Gladstone run nude hash
I should have asked for confirmation
Should have asked for referees
Then I wouldn't have you waving that wee winky thing at me
Go on now go
Just hit the track
Don't you bring me home no tiddlers
Coz I always throw them back
The only thing that I could do with a prick as small as yours
Is to stick it with a toothpick
Dip it in tomato sauce
Go on now go
Get out of my sight
I'm going back to my appliance
Coz I know its length is right
And if I ever see your tiny tockly at my door
You'll be counting up your inches
As you pick them off the floor
Go on now go!
