An old man goes to a chemist to buy some Viagra. 'Can I have 6 tablets, cut in quarters?'
' I can cut them for you ' said the chemist ' but a quarter tablet will not give you a full erection. '
' I am 96 ' said the old man . ' I don't want an erection. I just want it sticking out far enough so I don't piss on my slippers. '
